Did you have a wonderful holiday season, ate too much, and played in the snow?  I had a relaxing, chill time with my boyfriend and friends.  Watched "Le Miserable" on X'mas, not the best movie to get in the holiday spirit.  Here is  picture from Dec 12, 2012 Stewart Stephenson Modern Art Gallery's Grand Opening, myself, Elias Arjan and the world class sculpture Lyle Sopel and his wife Colette and son Curtis.

                         Stewart Stephenson Modern Art Gallery Grand Opening

December 12, 2012 marked an auspicious day and the grand opening of Stewart Stephenson Modern Art Gallery at 1300 Robson Street. It was a red carpet affair where beautiful women in extremely high heels ran between the various art forms like gazelles across the African plain. Delicious canapé was provided by the superb restaurant next door FORAGE, known for using fresh local ingredients. Exciting performances from local bands added to the spice, while a body-painted goddess was a focal point of a picture taken in front of the $40,000 art piece that was raffled away at 9pm. Close to 300 people were in attendance and many commented that the vibes were equal to an art gallery opening in New York or Miami. The 12 artists represented at the opening included a mix of painting, sculpture, pottery, and jewellery. A monthly gala has been promised to showcase artists and establish Stewart Stephenson Modern Art Gallery as the most happening venue for the cool cats of Vancouver. Check out more information at www.stewartstephenson.com  

                                   When the body says No ~ Dr. Gabor Mate
 
I first became aware of Dr. Gabor Mate while TV surfing and was intrigued by a CBC documentary special about him. On it, Dr. Mate was leading a healing experiment with drug addicts from Vancouver's Downtown Eastside going to Peru to use traditional healing involving Ayahuasca.  I saw Dr. Mate again on a TED talk where he was discussing how the immune system is turned off by stress and emotional repression. On YouTube, I discovered quite a bit of lectures he’s previously given at conferences. It was an eye opening experience and it continued serendipitously. Over the holidays, I was cat sitting for a girlfriend who is an avid book collector, and she just happened to have this marvelous book by Dr. Mate, so I began reading it.
 
Here are some of the points he shared about what emotional competence represents:
·       The capacity to feel our emotions, so that we are aware of stress when we are experiencing it.
·       The ability to express our emotions effectively and assert our needs, while maintaining the integrity of our emotional boundaries.
·       The facility to distinguish between psychological reactions to present situations and emotional residue from the past.  What we want and demand from the world needs to address our present needs, instead of our unconscious and unsatisfied needs from childhood. If distinctions between past ad present blur, we will perceive loss or the threat of loss where none exists.
·       The awareness of those genuine needs that do require satisfaction, rather than their repression for the sake of gaining the acceptance or approval of others.
 
Some additional points from Dr. Mate:
·       Stress occurs in the absence of these criteria, and it leads to the disruption of homeostasis.  Chronic disruption results in ill health.
·       Emotional competence is what we need to develop if we are to protect ourselves from the hidden stresses that create a risk to health, and it is what we must regain if we are to heal. We need to foster emotional competence in our children as the best preventative medicine.
·       The stress literature amply documents that real or perceived helplessness is a potent trigger for biological stress responses.
·       People who have Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis have been observed to have the nicest personalities. They are also the ones who have displayed the inability to say no to others and deeply repress their own negative emotions.
·       People-pleasing adult behaviour can often be traced back to childhood conditioning. Children born and raised in an environment where the mother was ill or was too stressed to provide appropriate care will often become the adult to protect the mother from emotional pain and not lose the relationship. This self-repression / sacrifice unknowingly creates a pattern of coping mechanisms that can lead to disastrous health problems, even cancer.